I'm going to need a body double. And my own house bus.

You guys!

Nobody told me that being a lazy blogger was costing me my chance to be rich and famous!

Did nobody see Sookie's comment on my last blog post?  Trying to recruit me to star in a television series?

Look, I write this thing.  I can't be expected to READ it, too.

. . .

Some further investigation reveals she might not be exactly offering stardom and a lucrative contract, as much as an invitation to the chance to apply to appear, for free, on a television show about weird pregnancies.

I beg your pardon.

I have never been anything but normal.  Or, if not normal, exactly, I have never been far enough outside of the range of normal to be of interest to anybody.

She wanted to hear about my experience with pica in pregnancy, which, I mean, did she not read my blog post about it?*

Because the blog post is pretty much it.  I wanted to eat laundry detergent.  A lot.  But I didn't.  The end. They couldn't even make a fifteen minute segment about that.

I am also quite sure I don't want to appear on TV.  I hear the camera adds ten pounds.  You know what else adds ten pounds?  Vacations.  And I've been on four of them this summer.



*Of course she has!  It's a front page Google search result for Pica + Pregnancy, holla!  See, I don't need Sookie and her suspiciously trendy name to bring me fame!