What about ME?

I know the etiquette is that you only get a baby shower the first time around.

But I was just thinking, out of the blue, nothing to do with me, probably just occurred to me because I was reading an article or something, that I think people should should get presents every time they have a baby.

I mean, what, like it got EASIER?

So I'm going to simplify things and just let you know what I need.

1) Books. I got pregnant. I got very sick. I couldn't read anymore. I stopped reading. Now I have no books. Somebody go get me some books. Easy to read ones. Physically as well as reader-ly. I need things to read one-handed in the dim light of middle-of-the-night feedings.

2) Food. Frozen. For the love of god, somebody please make us a casserole. We can barely make dinner now, and I suspect the boys will still want to eat after the baby gets here.

3) Bike and bike trailer. Chris is going to need a way to entertain the boys while I nap and eat bon-bons.

4) Somebody come find all our baby stuff. Where the heck did we put the bottles? What happened to all our pacifiers? Why can't I find the baby bouncy seat?

So there you have it. I knew you were all wondering what you could do for me, so here you go.

What's that you say? That I could do all that for myself?

Well, sure, but it would interfere with my lying down and whining.