Wednesday, July 3, 2013

This phone call happened to me

I'm at work and the phone rings.

Let me pause for a minute to explain that I work in research administration.  Which means I work with research proposals and protocols and things like that.  But that's pretty much it.

So I answer the phone (that was my first mistake . . .) and this lady starts talking a mile a minute about her medical records and how she wants a copy but can't get a copy but people said she could have a copy but then only sent her forms to fill out and, ooooo, that made her made so she called our lawyers and he promised he would make sure she got her records but she still doesn't have her records.

Um.  Ma'am?  I don't really work in medical records.  I'm not the medical records office.  I really can't help with medical records.

So she says she KNOWS I'm not medical records and she doesn't want to talk to medical records anymore.

Um.  I'm not sure I was the right choice.

She says she thinks it's time to get a lawyer and that I'm going to have to pay for her lawyer.

Good luck with that.

She's taking NOTES, she says.  Keeping track of the names of everyone she's talking to.

(She's does not at this point, or any other point, ask for my name.)

She says she's been trying to get her records for OVER A YEAR.  SINCE 2008.

Ma'am?  It's been WELL over a year since 2008.

Well, she says, maybe 2009, then.

Ma'am?  I can hear that you are really frustrated, and I would be too, but I seriously have nothing to do with medical records.  I WANT to help you, but I CAN'T help you, so I don't know HOW to help you.  Can I put you in touch with medical records or the lawyer's office again?  Perhaps a patient advocate?

No, No, No.

She wants to go to the top.  No more playing around.  She's already messed around with those other people.  She knows for SURE that we have her records, because she called the other hospital in the area and described the building in which her procedure too place.  They said it was us.  And she needs her records.  Because, apparently, her "body systems aren't working."

That does sound serious.

So I gave her the CEO's number.

What?  If he doesn't want people calling him, he shouldn't put his number in the directory.


  1. Oh my god. I seriously live for this shit. You're amazing and I need more Beth in my life!

  2. I am dying. I can't decide which part is my favorite. I'm so glad you're blogging again!