Wednesday, July 3, 2013

These animals should be off-display

When we got home tonight, Owen asked if he could play out in the front yard.  They generally aren't allowed to - closer to the street, more accessible to kidnappers, more visible to neighbors who don't need to know how weird my kids are, etc.  

But, hey, it's a holiday weekend, live a little.

By the way, on the car ride home, Owen said he was going to share his granola bar with Lilly, because it's really important that you be nice on the day before St. Patrick's Day.  

Okay, three things here.

1) I'm not sure "being nice" is one of the hallmarks of St. Patrick's Day.

2) It's July 3rd

3) I just let it go because I was happy he was sharing his granola bar.  

So, anyhow, I told Owen and Lilly they could play out front for a while while I watched from the dining room.  

The following is a list of the first 3 things they did.

1) Stand motionless until a car drove by, and then made a mad dash toward the car.

2) Heckled slow moving cars.  And, for some reason, red cars.

3) Played dead on the lawn.

All of these things are, apparently, quite alarming to drivers passing by.  

I hustled them into the backyard.  It kind of made me think about taking animals off display at the zoo. 

Which reminded me about when the hippo at our zoo went into retirement.  All of a sudden, the hippo wasn't there anymore.  So Chris asks one of the zoo employees, who said that the hippo was retired and would no longer be on exhibit.

And Chris, eyebrows a-waggling, was like, "'Retired, retired?'"

And the lady, eyebrows drawn together in confusion, was like, "Yeah.  Retired."

And Chris leans in and whispers, "Like, dead?"

The lady was horrified.  

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