This Christmas, Chris and I broke our long standing resolution and bought the kids some Nerf guns.
We had rules. They stay on the third floor. No face shots. Don't shoot anyone until they have consented to be involved in the Nerfing.
And it hasn't been too problematic, really. Lilly doesn't like it, so she's off limits for shooting, and has a new role as the "bullet getter." (Sidenote: If Lilly likes you she will give you extra bullets. So be nice to Lilly).
But yesterday . . .
I look up and there is a gun pointed at me.
"Please don't shoot at me."
"I'm not shooting at you. I'm just practicing."
"Okay, but, that one came really close to my head."
"No, I'm just seeing how accurate it is."
"STOP POINTING THAT GUN IN MY DIRECTION. Seriously. I am being very clear right now. Pick up all these bullets that are all over the floor, and take the guns back to the third floor. They aren't supposed to be down here anyway."
Some time passes.
Pssswht. With this one, I'm lucky I'm not blind.
"WHAT THE HELL."
"sorry sorry sorry"
"DID I STUTTER?"
"Sorry I forgot sorry."
"I honestly don't understand what is wrong with you. Seriously. That isn't funny and it's completely inappropriate and very disrespectful."
Obviously, I was having this entire conversation with Chris.